International Men’s Day

On November 19, we will be celebrating International Men’s Day. To celebrate and promote this year’s theme; Zero Male Suicide, I sat with Alex from Andy’s Man Club, the a male mental health group held in the Town Hall, every Monday (except Bank Holidays) from 7pm.

What is Andy’s Man Club, and how did it end up coming to Thame?
Andy’s Man Club is a men’s mental health charity. They run FREE peer-to-peer support groups where men can come together in an environment free from judgement. 
The groups run every Monday (except for bank holidays) from 7pm-9pm, in over 155 locations nationwide. 
Alex, Darren, Tobias & Nick are the 4 founding facilitators who decided that Thame needed to be one of those locations, following the suicide of their dear friend & Thame resident, Jack. 
The club has been open since June and has been seeing great regular attendance, with new faces coming every week. 
 
Many, including men find talking about their mental health a difficult topic, what are the types of conversations you and the group have?
Conversations cover a wide range of topics, from family struggles to financial stress, from work frustrations to health worries. 
The only topics that we avoid discussing are religion, politics, medication & on-going criminal investigations. Other than that – attendees are welcome to discuss whatever it is they feel they need to.
With that being said – there is never an obligation to talk, if someone doesn’t want to share,
that is fine too.
 
Describe an average evening at Andy’s Man Club
The structure of the session runs exactly the same at every club across the country. 
We start with introductions and then get into the questions. Questions 1-3 are always the same:

1. How has your week been?
This gives people the chance to reflect on their week as a whole and ease the group into conversation. 
2. Give us one positive thing from your week.
This encourages people to try and find something that went well or made them feel good this week. 
3. Have you got anything to get off of your chest?
This is the ‘biggie’. This is when people get the opportunity to vent, rant, talk through and generally let go of whatever is stressing them out that week. 
We then have a coffee break before heading into questions 4&5 which change each week and are designed to get some conversations going and close the group on a positive, especially if there has been anything particularly ‘heavy’ that we’ve discussed.
For example, Q4&5 for this week are; 
4. International men’s day is this Sunday. So, if you could do one this that has a positive impact on another man this week, what would it be and why? 
5. What movie do you enjoy quoting the most? (quick fire) 
The group then finishes, although time-permitting, guys are welcome to hang back and talk further with each other or facilitators if they need. 
 
What is your favourite thing about the group and attending every Monday?
I am really enjoying seeing new faces come through the door every week.
Not everyone comes every week, but there are always new guys, without fail. 
Men coming together from all different walks of life, age groups, professions, it’s inspiring to see men coming together to open up and being able to offer support to others at the same time.
Be that insight from a similar experience, or just offering a listening ear. 
The first step is talking. 
 
Other than joining Andy’s man club, what do you think men should do to help their mental health?
This is something we often discuss at AMC, and I always see a similar theme of physical exercise. 
Those two words can often strike fear into the heart of many of us.
However, exercise can be something as simple as getting out in the fresh air for a walk.
 
If a male of any age was reading this and struggling with their mental health, what message would you like to give them?
Very simply – you are not the only one, and it is okay to talk. 
Opening up for the first time will be one of the scariest steps to take, but we can offer somewhere free, anonymous and safe for you to do so. 
Please, don’t feel you are alone in this struggle.

Andy’s Man Club runs every Monday (except Bank Holidays) from 7pm at Thame Town Hall.